I, like most people, love a good comeback. Cher? Always here for it. Choker necklaces? Not a part of my life, but I appreciate it. Me, when I decide to actually accomplish things on my to-do list instead of putzing around the internet? My favorite! This Gilmore Girls revival? Not so much.
Guys, before I tuned in on Friday, I fully expected to come back to the blog Monday with a glowing review, so much so that I’d post pone my race recap (and I never do that!), but as you may have noticed that didn’t happen. Nor was there a post on Wednesday. I tried all week to come up with good things to say about this show but I fell flat. So freakin’ flat. Like a Coke left open for a 100 years flat. With the exception of one character’s storyline, and a few small moments, I don’t think I could be more disappointed if I tried. It doesn’t help that reading the Gilmore Girls subreddit everyday (my life is spiraling, y’all) just brings to light more flaws, and things that could have been executed better, and maybe I just need a rewatch to find new perspective, but from where I stand now, this review isn’t so good…
I feel kind of “meh” about Lorelai’s storyline. I expected her and Luke to get married, and I loved that wedding scene, but I’m confused as to how we were supposed to believe that they waited nine years to discuss having kids. They briefly glossed over the each of them expecting other to bring up the topic eventually, but I just have a hard time buying that something as big as discussing kids wasn’t an actual sit down conversation. As for Lorelai and the Inn, my original assumption that she may have wanted something more was thwarted by that actually being Michel’s dream but my biggest “WTF???” was that Sookie dropped out of the Inn entirely. I’m going to chalk it up to scheduling conflicts with Melissa McCarthy, but it just seems strange that Sookie would abandon their dream to…eat dirt? Wouldn’t that have been a more fitting job for her vegetable obsessed husband, Jackson? Also, I’ll touch more on this when I get to Rory (and BOY will I), but why wasn’t Lorelai more upset with Rory’s affair with Logan, let alone her relaxed approach on cheating on Paul? Lorelai threw a fit, and rightfully so, when she caught Rory and Dean together, and seemed to never really be on board with the second rekindling of their romance, so why was she so flippant when Rory spilled the beans about Logan when they were in New York together? Girl, please.
What. In. The. Hell. Happened to Rory? I have made it very clear on this blog that I can’t stand original series seasons 5 through 7 Rory, but revival Rory was a waking nightmare. I honestly don’t even know where to begin. Being blatanly unprepared for the web magazine interview? Not utilizing any means of contacts or networking to find a new lead/job? Falling asleep during an interview? SLEEPING WITH AN INTERVIEW SUBJECT? Logan? Constantly forgetting about Paul (who seemed so nice by the way! I’m sorry, Paul!)? Claiming her mother’s life story as her own to write and not understanding why Lorelai would initially be upset? Being half present, if at all, during her interview with
River Song Alex Kingston’s character? It’s been nine years since we left Rory with Barack Obama’s campaign. I would assume since then she would have done a lot more than write three freelance articles. And you know what? I would have settled with a story line where she was genuinely struggling with work, or her career path, but I feel like we were half heartedly given the idea that when we meet Rory again in “Winter” that she is super successful, and in later episodes just in a bit of a rut. Girl, you are not working. At all. She’s just lounging around and whining. I’d go as far as to say she was as lazy as she was when she dropped out of Yale, but at least she had her mandatory volunteer work to bide time during the day. Present day Rory is just jet setting to London (with what money???) to be on call for Logan, and bumming around Stars Hollow. I’m not sure if this Rory is the product of lazy writing, or if Amy Sherman-Palladino genuinely thought Rory was on the right path, but I just can’t get behind it.
I am completely satisfied with Emily’s arc and thought it was beautifully executed. If I had to make a complaint I would probably note that I was a little confused with the maid situation. At first it seemed endearing, but after her entire family moved in I was like, “Um, Emily girl I think you’re getting taken advantage of here.” If Kelly Bishop doesn’t walk away with an Emmy after this then I know absolutely nothing.
My biggest wish for this revival was to see Lane and Hep Alien killing it on a tour circuit, or having become an underground sensation. Instead, Lane was at home with the kids (totally okay, but it didn’t seem as if music was a priority anymore), and Zack was miserable in the corporate world. If we had to sacrifice a decent success story for Rory, why couldn’t we have given it to Lane, the one person who wanted to leave Stars Hollow the most and devote her life to music? This is not the revival Lane Kim deserved! (Shout out to finally meeting Mr. Kim though. He seemed pleasant.)
- Dean: The five minutes we got was enough. Boy bye!
- Jess: Never enough time. It should have been six hours of his face.
- Logan: I was eating pizza when his first scene came up and the second his face appeared I took the napkin was using and ripped it in half out of anger. So yeah, could have done without him too.
Sorry for cursing, but WHAT? That musical scene was FIFTEEN MINUTES LONG. Did Amy Sherman Palladino fight the urge to fall asleep after taking an Ambien while writing that scene? I kept waiting for the point to come across, but all I got was Sutton Foster singing about pioneer times and some guy repeatedly throwing a plastic glass at a wall? I am so confused. If anyone has any insight, please explain. We could have used that time to give Lane a better story, explore the mysterious divorce between Paris and Doyle, or I don’t know, give Rory a f—ing job (again, sorry for the expletives)!
My initial reaction was absolute shock, but Jake, the one person on Earth who had the least amount of emotional investment in the show, surprisingly explained to me that it all make sense. Rory is on the path to Lorelai. Logan, rich and uninvolved will play out like Christopher, and Jess, will pine from afar, and probably act as a pseudo step-dad as Luke did. I can’t say that I love the final four words, but after Jake’s explanation I kind of get where they were going.
I apologize that I abandoned my Gilmore Fantasy League for this post. I pretty much scored zero points, but if you kept a tally please share in the comments! I hope you guys enjoyed the revival. However, if you’re like me and you’re finding it to be as disappointing, if not worse than season five of Arrested Development, please also feel free to commiserate with me in the comments!
What did you think of the revival?